Many times people try to excuse poor or negative behavioral traits by stating “This is just the way that I am.”
I was talking with an office manager about handling employee issues and coming out with a positive ending, and she mentioned that when she has to address mistakes or poor behavior with staff members she tends to have a short fuse and can be kind of harsh. After she said this, she immediately said: "But that is just the way I am; I've always been that way."
How we handle situations or respond to problems is a choice; it is a behavior we can control. Many times when people are told this they truly are stunned.
Because a person has always done something a certain way, does not mean they have to continue doing it that way. We have the choice of what we say, how we say it, what we think and how we behave and respond.
Here are three things people can do to change negative behavior habits into positive ones:
- Choose a positive outlook. Your thoughts make you who you are. You are responsible for your own actions and you have the ability to choose how your respond to your environment. If you make a conscious decision to begin each day with a positive outlook, negative situations that may come up cannot take that away unless you allow them to.
- Increase your self-awareness. Begin to better understand your emotional hot buttons. Examine how you make judgments about the things that happen. Tune in to your senses, get in touch with your feelings, learn what your intentions are, and pay attention to your actions.
- Motivate yourself on a daily basis. Motivate yourself by striving to meet your own criteria for success. Instead of relying on external validation, focus on using your job as the means for achieving your big-picture career objective.
It is important to remember we have choices in the way we behave. We should want to bring our best selves to work each day. Not only will we be happier people, but so will those we work with.
"It always seems impossible until it is done." ~ Nelson Mandela